Why Self-Determination Begins in Early Childhood
By Dr. Amy Coopersmith
When we think about preparing children for success, we often focus on academic skills — letters, numbers, reading readiness. But one of the most powerful predictors of long-term success isn’t found in a textbook. It’s found in a simple question:
“What do you choose?”
Choice-making is the foundation of self-determination — the ability to understand oneself, make decisions, solve problems, and take ownership of one’s actions. And it begins much earlier than many people realize.
What Is Self-Determination?
Self-determination is the ability to:
- Make choices
- Set goals
- Solve problems
- Advocate for oneself
- Reflect and adjust
For young children, this doesn’t mean making big life decisions. It means deciding which center to visit, which book to read, or how to solve a conflict with a friend. These small moments are practice for larger decisions later in life.
Why Choice-Making Matters in Early Childhood
1. Choice Builds Confidence
When children are given meaningful choices, they learn:
“My voice matters.”
Each decision they make — even something as simple as choosing crayons — reinforces their sense of agency. Over time, that agency becomes confidence.
2. Choice Strengthens Executive Function
Decision-making requires children to:
- Think about options
- Predict outcomes
- Regulate impulses
- Reflect on results
These are executive functioning skills that support learning, behavior, and emotional regulation.
3. Choice Increases Motivation
Children are far more engaged when they have ownership over what they’re doing.
When a child chooses an activity, they are more likely to:
- Persist through challenges
- Stay focused
- Take pride in their work
Motivation grows when children feel in control.
4. Choice Supports Emotional Regulation
Not being able to choose can feel frustrating — especially for young children.
When adults consistently make decisions for children, we may unintentionally increase feelings of helplessness. But when children are guided through the process of making decisions — even difficult ones — they learn how to tolerate uncertainty, manage frustration, and move forward.
What About Children with Disabilities?
For children with disabilities, choice-making is even more critical.
Too often, well-meaning adults step in quickly — choosing for them, solving for them, protecting them from struggle. While support is essential, over-support can unintentionally limit opportunities for independence.
Children who are given structured, supported opportunities to make choices develop stronger problem-solving skills and a deeper sense of self. They learn not just what to do — but how to decide what to do.
How Adults Can Support Self-Determination
Here are simple, powerful strategies for fostering choice-making:
✔ Offer two or three options through a choice board
✔ Allow wait time for decision-making
✔ Validate frustration when decisions feel hard
✔ Teach children how to reflect: “How did that choice work out?”
✔ Model your own decision-making process aloud
The goal isn’t perfect decisions. The goal is practice.
The Long-Term Impact
Research consistently shows that self-determination is linked to improved academic outcomes, stronger employment prospects, better mental health, and increased overall life satisfaction.
But it doesn’t start in high school.
It starts in preschool.
It starts with small, everyday decisions.
It starts with trusting children to try.
When we give children the opportunity to choose, we are giving them something far greater than control over a moment.
We are giving them practice in becoming motivated, capable, confident human beings.
And that is a gift that lasts a lifetime.
Choice Boards are a great way to encourage choice making and improve motivation. “I’m Stuck” features an activity section with ten choice boards to use with children every day. To download additional free ready-made Choice Boards, go to the Self-Determination Resources page at amycoopersmith.com!